@_whatmakesaman_'s testosterone rant, fact-checked

What did @_whatmakesaman_ actually say?

He was reacting to a viral list claiming everyday behaviors, things like "saying we're pregnant," owning a small dog, using an umbrella, or eating dessert, cause low testosterone. His response was essentially: this is nonsense, ignore it. He ended with a genuinely sensible point: "Testosterone goes up and down in men every day. And over time, it reduces. It's perfectly natural. If you're worried, go to a doctor."

To be clear about the framing here, he was not making clinical claims. He was mocking a different creator's pseudoscientific masculinity content, and mostly doing a decent job of it. The list he was reacting to had zero physiological basis. Thanking your waiter does not suppress luteinizing hormone. Letting someone else drive does not tank your androgen receptor sensitivity. These are social performances dressed up as endocrinology, and calling that out is the right move.

Does the science back this up?

Yes, mostly. The behaviors on that original list have no credible mechanistic link to testosterone levels. The creator is correct that testosterone fluctuates daily, and that it declines gradually with age. Both of those points are well-supported in the literature.

Testosterone follows a diurnal rhythm, peaking in the early morning and dropping by 25-50% by late afternoon. This is well-established. Brambilla et al. (2009, Journal of Endocrinological Investigation) documented this pattern clearly, which is why clinical guidelines recommend morning blood draws for diagnosis. Long-term, age-related decline is also real. Harman et al. (2001, Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism) tracked men in the Baltimore Longitudinal Study of Aging and found testosterone declines roughly 1-2% per year after 30, though the trajectory varies considerably between individuals. What does not cause low testosterone? Eating pudding. Using an umbrella. Accepting a handshake someone else initiates.

What did they get wrong (or right)?

He got the core biology right, and he got the cultural critique right. Where he was slightly imprecise, though not dangerously so, is the implication that testosterone changes are purely passive and age-driven. That framing undersells modifiable lifestyle factors that actually do matter.

Sleep deprivation is a real suppressor of testosterone. Leproult and Van Cauter (2011, JAMA) showed that restricting sleep to five hours per night for one week reduced testosterone levels in young men by 10-15%. Obesity, particularly visceral fat accumulation, is associated with lower testosterone through increased aromatase activity converting testosterone to estradiol. Chronic psychological stress elevates cortisol, which inhibits gonadotropin-releasing hormone. None of this makes his broader point wrong, but "it's perfectly natural" could leave someone thinking nothing they do matters. That is not quite right either. Lifestyle factors are real levers, even if umbrella usage is not one of them.

What should you actually know?

If you suspect low testosterone, the only way to know is a blood test. Symptoms like fatigue, low libido, mood changes, and reduced muscle mass are non-specific and overlap with thyroid disorders, depression, sleep apnea, and about a dozen other conditions. Self-diagnosing based on whether you thank your server is not a diagnostic strategy.

Clinically, hypogonadism is diagnosed when total testosterone falls below roughly 300 ng/dL on two separate morning measurements, combined with symptomatic presentation. The Endocrine Society guidelines (Bhasin et al., 2018, Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism) are clear on this. Gas station "T boosters," which the creator also correctly dismisses, are largely unregulated, poorly studied, and some contain ingredients with real drug interaction risks. If your testosterone is genuinely low and causing symptoms, that is a clinical conversation worth having, not a supplement aisle decision.